Matthew, This whole ordeal sounds like you're wantingly flogging yourself to death with the fork issue.:~) As Chonny said,, take a deep breath and let it out slowly...
I know you want to do all of this yourself, but with the luck you're NOT having, maybe it's time to call in a professional. I would go to someone who can patiently remove the existing steerer and then braze in a new one. If the job is rushed, or not performed by someone who is experienced you run the risk of loosing the whole fork. Even a pro will tell you there is a bit of risk involved and there is always a chance it might not work, but project has a better chance of success in the hands of experience. (I'm not trolling for work here, just trying to give my best advice.) That said if you do need help with this I would lend a hand... After all, Cirque is looming up and I want to see this 'Nago there!
peter weigle
soggy lyme, ct.