Greetings campers and swap survivors
Whew, that was just too close. Finally confronting the consequences of some "new" physical realities, and was working on a list of things to sell next (Three frames delivered to new homes this year, and passed up a few that were for sale. You know that just ain't right.) when I was referred to a new voodoo quack. Immediately postponed all decisions on potentially expendable junque, at least until the Westminster swap or spring T-town, while he takes his best shot at getting me back on a bike. He was described somewhat apologetically by the physical therapy gang as "eccentric, and weird, but he gets good results". My response was, "Excellent, but is he eccentric and weird enough for ME? And why didn't you tell me about this kook a year ago?!" My frame of reference for eccentric and weird is pretty extreme, so we'll wait and see. Diagnosis, after much poking, prodding, and pulling of every joint and muscle - "Kid, you're a mess. You physically get off the bike, but your body doesn't know." An interesting hypothesis, not yet sure if that's good news of bad news, but makes more sense than anything I've heard from the most recent parade of ineffective "mainstream health care professionals". Great. Wonderful. Just what I need. More internal conflicts. Apparently more an indication of a brain that never gets off the bike than of muscles & joints that are too confused to know when they can stop and rest. I can't even pretend to be surprised. And if he turns out to be right, which of us is the weirder one? A philosophical discussion best left for another day.
But on the upside, with a new prescription for a few milligrams of uncharacteristic optimism, and a potentially hazardous overdose of self delusion, I cheerfully transferred the deed and keys for my swap spot to new residents Wayne & MJ Bingham/Weier, (while retaining squatter's rights for my confused butt and any new loot), who transformed it into Mel Pinto's warehouse annex - north. A few additional contributions to the product line made by Mike Schmidt and Tom Hayes. Some very interesting stuff in Wayne's pile. I'm this close to stripping the threads on a bottom bracket shell just to have a use for an Edco offset locking threadless sealed cartridge bottom bracket. Or just install it on a Raleigh frame, which is probably the next closest thing to having stripped threads. Great entertainment. But when Wayne caught me playing with the merchandise, and quoting a ridiculous high price to potential buyers for a set of his wheels that I was sort of interested in and had hidden under the table, I was immediately fired as second assistant salesperson, and therefore free to return to my regularly scheduled bottom feeding. Ahhhh, THAT felt "normal". Soooo much more fun than selling stuff, and I was haunted by those three empty bike hooks that need to be re-filled......
.....but not quite normal. And still haunted by those empty hooks. Didn't buy Billy's Carlton (I still don't know why), or Tom's Cirrus touring frame (which had mercifully been sold by the time I started to waver), or any other bike or frame that might turn into an expensive disappointment and new disposal challenge I can't ride if this quack isn't weird enough. Disappointing to discover that my self delusion skills are rustier than my bikes, just when I need them the most. Something else to work on. An annoyingly restrained state of mind, which also affected my interactions with other people. Normally I amuse myself by encouraging other people to buy stuff they don't need, just to be obnoxious, and annoy their spouses, but this time I tended to talk people out of buying things. Kinda defeats the whole purpose of being there. Didn't make any new friends among the vendors either, discrete and diplomatic as I am in such situations, but it was an interesting role reversal experience. Hope it doesn't happen again. Hate being the voice of reason. The voice of reason doesn't get up at 1AM to drive to a swap. The voice of reason gets old and bored and cranky. What?! Don't look at me like that. I'm not bored yet.
Acquired just a few odds and ends. Unknown brand triplizer chainring to add to the "just in case" inventory, a couple pairs of wheels (but now of course there's a sudden need for QR skewers for Weyless hubs, if anybody has some they can part with), a Phil bottom bracket that might accidentally fit one of my assorted triple cranks, a few other little oddities. Really just needed a day with the kooks, and THEIR new junque. Every attempted expedition back to the car for a hat or snack resulted in a detour with somebody back into the chaos. Never did get to the hat, and still being reminded of that carelessness. Yeah, prices seemed higher than ever, but Ebay just doesn't provide the same experience. On ebay, no one can hear you scream. On ebay, the seller can't hear you laugh out loud, or see that expression on your face. You know, the slightly astonished and stunned look that asks as politely as possible, "Are you TOTALLY de-ranged?!" without moving your lips (which would probably say something much less polite), and other forms of non-violent interpersonal capitalistic & cross-cultural contact.
Many of the usual suspects, some there that I never actually saw, but a few faces missing. Hope they were out riding somewhere. Perfect weekend would have been to drive on to the Romeu ride on Sunday. Looked like a lot of fun. Maybe next year.
Thanks to the miracle of atomic mutation.... Larry "The Brain that Wouldn't Stop Pedalling" Osborn Bruceton Mills, West Virginia USA