[CR] CIRQUE XIII, or Leesburg 3-D

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Date: Wed, 09 Jun 2010 16:56:02 -0500
To: classicrendezvous@bikelist.org
From: "Larry Osborn" <losborn2@wvu.edu>
Subject: [CR] CIRQUE XIII, or Leesburg 3-D


Greetings campers and crash test dummies

Wellllllll, that was fun. What can I say. I'll keep coming back until there is nothing to come back to, or until I cannot do it. Too much fun to miss. Learned a little too much about a few old friends, and met a few new ones I look forward to learning a little too much about in the future. Many others absent who's company I missed. That's the way it is.

No food poisonings at all this year, (that's a first) so I got to participate in everything except the unscheduled midnight test rides. Maybe next year. An amusing knife point confrontation with MJ, who was intent on defending a chocolate cake w/chocolate frosting prior to one of the evening events. I backed off, but did eventually get a piece of cake, and suffered no internal or external consequences. It's just a cake to you, but more of an extreme sport for me. Getting away with it is a huge step forward.

Had the strangest pre-Cirque feeling the last couple weeks. Don't remember ever having this feeling before. Actually had a bike ready BEFORE the event. Even the insides of the frame tubes were done. Don't know how to act under those circumstances. Kept looking at the bike, wondering what I had forgotten to do. Kinda miss that traditional last minute frenzy event, in the hotel room installations & assembly with minimal tools, on-the-ride adjustments and lost component retrievals from the grass. (No, that last one was yours Mike.). Could have tried to out-polish the Elman-ator, but that ain't gonna happen. I prefer the patina of an unrestored old bike, and choose to channel my obsessive behaviours in other directions.

The bike has been high on my lust list for many years. (See Artley photos from Sunday). Appeared at a time when I needed to do something uncharacteristically optimistic, like pretend I was going to get to ride it. Blew my bottom feeder bucks for the whole year back in November, but haven't regretted it for a moment. Saw the listing and immediately snapped into "if not now, when?" mode. Don't have another 20+ years to wait for the "next best one", or even the "next one that might be worth buying" to show up. Some days even I can be the craziest person on ebay. Spousal unit often wonders about the source of those rare "little smiles she doesn't understand" that come over my face without warning, but there was no wondering going on since November. The source was right there in the living room, where it belongs. What can I say. Certain bikes just belong in my little world. Another piece in the puzzle.

Getting to the Cirque, however, was a whole different adventure. A truly annoying set of impediments this trip. Road completely closed on the PA side. Road washed out in the WV/MD direction, but detour through the stream passable to small vehicles. Clutch hydraulic cylinder crapped out while running last minute errands in town prior to departure. Two low speed multi-vehicle chain reaction collisions in front of me to weave through on the way to get the car repaired (or to rent a replacement if that was necessary). Too late in the day to accomplish anything else at work by the time the car was ready, so I hit the road. Ten miles later discovered (too late) that the interstate was closed due to a flaming tractor trailer loaded with new cars, eastbound. (That had to look pretty cool roaring down the road. And if anybody in the Baltimore area was waiting for their new Toyota, there will be a slight delay....). No alternate route in that area, so another hour spent in the jam, in the sun with no air conditioning, road testing the clutch repair, at least minimally comfortable in the wisdom of never leaving home without snacks and drinks, and an empty bladder. Clear sailing after that, until with the bright lights of Leesburg glowing on the horizon, Route 15 was closed after a storm and mysterious men in black with flashlights were directing traffic down roads I've never seen before. I just followed the parade. A relatively easy 3 hour drive turned into 5+ hours, plus an afternoon at the car repair place. Great fun. And I wouldn't hesitate to do it again. I WILL get to the Cirque.

No chance of getting there for the shop tea party Thursday, so the next best thing was to ride Friday. First time in many years I've been able to join a Cirque ride and was having a great time on the trail Friday morning, pretending to be part of the group ride, even though the group had long since disappeared over the horizon. But hadn't ridden around other people since Artley's vintage ride last fall so my normal self preservation mechanisms were a bit rusty. A mutual lapse with another rider at low speed led to my first involuntary Artley acrobatic moment since age 5. A less than graceful three point landing on head, shoulder, and knee. (I'll take the blow to the head please). Stuff dripping from my head was only sweat, I was still seeing only one of everything, and most importantly the bike was okay, so off we went again. Other than temporary Tourettes syndrome (rediscovery of some favorite expletives), I must admit I found the whole experience quite unsatisfying. I don't know why Dan keeps doing it. What is the attraction? I must be missing some critical part of the exercise. I must be doing it wrong. Maybe I should get some pointers from The Master. I had that opportunity later in the day. Lucky me.

I get one ride at this particular low point in my ongoing 30+ year physical rehab program, and only one ride, so I have to make the most of each one. Grabbed some water & snacks back at the hotel and was headed out for a few more miles to finish myself off for the week. Dan felt like riding some more before the afternoon ride so away we went. And soon after that I received my personalized demonstration of how to crash properly. Not up to his usual level of self destruction, nothing spectacularly U-Tube worthy, just the basic dance steps, I am just a beginner at this. My memory is mostly visual so while Dan was picking rocks out of his shin I was quietly replaying everything I had seen in my head and saying to myself "Ohhhhh, so THAT's how it's done." I haven't signed up for the full course, but if I ride with Dan again next year I might get another lesson. It's like a bonus seminar.

Spousal unit was unable to attend this year, but that evening I called to inform her of the days fun-filled activities. Before anybody else did. Upon returning home she told me about a recurring image she had all weekend about possible alternative events if Dan and I had put ourselves in the emergency room. The primary components revolved around her and Barb Artley arriving at the hospital, and sharing a "sisters" moment together by clubbing us like baby seals, and variations on that theme. I can hardly wait.

There was an up side to all this mayhem. Apparently I did some more uncharacteristic purchasing at the swap. There were a couple frames in the car on the way home that did not attend the Cirque with me. There was no "voice of reason" companion for me while I wandered the swap, and the one in my head was strangely silent, so I did NOT delay gratification this time. A couple people noticed, and commented that this was not normal behaviour, but I realized the only possible explanation was a mild concussion, and I didn't know what I was doing. Hey, it coulda happened that way. What do I know? I took a blow to the head. That's MY story, and I'm sticking to it. Have a year to come up with a new one.

And just to keep some of you in perspective next I start to wonder (and this does fit right in with conversations with a couple other past attendees who were looking for something "different" to do after the Cirque, but were unable to get here this year)......

A News of the Weird Classic (November 2003)

In October 2003, West Point, Ky., hosted 12,000 visitors for the weekend Knob Creek Gun Range Machine Gun Shoot, billed as the nation's largest, with a separate competition for flame-throwers. Especially coveted is "The Line," where 60 people (the waiting list is 10 years long to be admitted) get to fire their machine guns into a field of cars and boats, and during which a shooter might run through $10,000 in ammunition. Among the champions: Samantha Sawyer, 16, the top women's submachine gunner for the previous four years. One man interviewed by the Louisville Courier-Journal said he met his future wife at a previous Shoot, impressed that "she could accept flame-throwing as a hobby." Said another: "This is one of those times when you know (America) is the greatest place on Earth." [Courier-Journal, 10-19-03]

And of course there's a website: http://americanfestivalsproject.net/2008/10/17/73/

Yikes !! Makes the Cirque look so tame. I've often suggested to our sainted organizers that it might be fun to add a flame throwing event. Maybe as a fund-raising thing to supplement the charity auction. How well does carbon fiber burn? Maybe next year we'll find out. And even if they don't listen to my whiney suggestions and complaints, and threaten me again with long sharp knives or other implements of destruction, it's still a great event. And the only show in town anymore. I cannot thank them enough for providing a gathering like this.

Larry Osborn
Bruceton Mills, West Virginia - USA