Jon Spangler
Writer/editor
Linda Hudson Writing
TEL 510-864-2144
CEL 510-846-5356
JonSwriter@att.net
http://www.linkedin.com/
John,
I ignored my own good intentions to go in the house for just a second before securely locking the bike in the locked garage. And have been literally crying over this loss for 24 hours. it is not exactly the best time for me to be open to learning much of anything, but the outpouring of compassionate support, understanding, and practical assistance from many people on and off of this list has made a huge and positive difference.
The problem is that I have attention deficit disorder, and I got distracted once inside (preoccupied with helping a friend of ours in distress) and forgot about the bike, as important as it is (was) to me. I've lost 5 previous bikes to theft, so it isn't as if i have not been through all the rational and logical reasoning about bike security more than once, including many previous stern lectures about security, many of them self-administered.
Frankly, your emailed "lecture" feels rather abusive. While your words may have been well-intentioned, they feel more mean than anything else, and they do not help or educate. And while painful to read, your unsolicited "discipline" is far less painful than my own remorse and self-inflicted pain at losing a bike and components that meant a great deal to me for 35 of my 58 years.
Please be a bit more compassionate the next time you respond to someone who is hurting. I have begun to learn--to my chagrin--that the well-meaning sermons I often delivered about locks, security, helmets, and such (dozens of times) to others in similar circumstances are often just like pouring salt in a wound. The salt does nothing to educate, support, or help anyone, at least at the time.
Compassion and support are much more helpful and educational. Judgment is not. I can provide plenty of that all by myself.
Regards,
Jon Spangler still grieving in Alameda, CA
Message: 9 Date: Tue, 6 Apr 2010 11:55:30 -0700 (PDT) From: John D Proch <johnprochss@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: [CR] STOLEN--white Peugeot UO-18 Mixte :-( To: Jon Spangler <jonswriter@att.net>, classicrendezvous@bikelist.org Message-ID: <600391.23217.qm@web111006.mail.gq1.yahoo.com> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
Hello Jon,
The rule is you are to never leave unattended. I am not trying to be rude and these are moments that you are hurting. It has happened to me. Start watching Ebay for your parts or frame, because it most likely will be either ridden (least probable), sold at a pawn shop or resold on Ebay, Craigslist, etc. Report this to your local law enforcement PRONTO!!! They will work some, but you have to be a pain in the rear with them. Call every day and ask what they have done and don't put up with the crap of "Well, we will look around and put this in our blankedy blank computer system and WE WILL CALL YOU"! Go and hit all the pawn shops within 60 miles of where you live. Get nasty with them too, but not too much, because they will not want to be recognized either as a "fence", which is another name as the catcher of the goods. Get to work, because the first 72 hours are EXTREMELY important!!!
Then I have a few words for you, so hang on.......you quote "outside of our apartment this evening between 6 and 10 PM. It was not locked--I left it outside "just for a minute" How is between 6 and 10, just for a minute. You must be more careful! I see that you were not careful!! Not Locked? I was raised in Dallas,Texas and I have a big problem with this. Do you realize that "unlocked is not good"??? Between 6 and 10? That is 4 hours. Where does that refer to between 6 and 10??? I am going to post this to the the CR thread, because the odds that the thief being on the CR list is slim. You MUST be more careful! If you don't remember when it was between 6 and 10, that is understandable, but never leave your bike unattended. I hope you will remember this next time, so anyway, don't waste time reading anymore of the CR emails at this time. "72 HOURS" Many of my friends are police officers and you must get to work now and I hope and pray that you will find your bike!
John Proch
La Grange, Texas